Menino Ready for A New "Hoax?"

"Hmm. How should I answer that question? I knew this question was coming today. And I was preparing some optional answers for this particular question. Should I say, 'I have that ball'? Or I could say, 'Which particular ball are you referring to?' Or 'Which ball are you calling a gyroball?' Overall, if I have the chance, I will pitch that ball."

- Daisuke Matsuzaka, when asked about the mysterious gyroball

If new Red Sox pitcher and auto-sensation Dice-K doesn't throw a "gyroball" will Boston Mayor Tom Menino call it a “hoax” and demand retribution and remuneration?

After all, the precedent has been set to demand payment for being made to look silly, and nobody has seen the gyroball yet.

Mayor Tommy could declare that Boston had been duped. We're well down that road since a dozen strategically placed lite-brites brought down the head of the Cartoon Network. And the two guys who installed them for CN's ad agency are still legally on the hook.

So, if the gyroball turns out to be a mythological bargaining chip to up the financial ante to the unfathomable US$52-million, six-year contract “Dice-K” landed, doesn’t that qualify as a similar hoax, the mayor might say?

Menino could say that Boston had already invested a great deal of unconditional fan love and breathless media time on the celebrity status of new pitcher Daisuke Matsuzaka and that the city needed to be compensated for once again being made to look silly hoaxed.

Right. I think the answer from Matsuzaka’s agent, former CN head Jim Samples and yours truly would be …